Last night at my book signing a women asked me about the structure in life story writing. I tried to explain that once you start to write your story you will find the structure for your book. She was not happy with the answer. She was looking for an outline that would give her a step by step way to create her story. After the signing as we were walking out she started to talk about all the falls she has taken. I said you might want to structure your chapters with each of her major falls and how it effective her life. Then she had her Aah moment!
Each one of our stories are so unique that having an outline of how to structure the story does a disservice to our lives. My mother-in-law did her chapters by all the houses she had lived in her life time. She had lived in over 22 homes during her life. Each place had a unique story to tell. My mother’s story started with her grandparents and went through present day in order. I have worked on stories where a major life factor or challenge has changed that persons thinking and the story starts there and then works backwards.
When I teach life story writing I explain the rules of writing. I tell my rules of memoir or life story wiring and then at they end explain that there are no rules. You create your own rules and then obey them. I know this is very unsettling for those who want a recipe to follow. But each of our lives is so different unless I hear some of your stories I can not give you a formula. It is by taking the time to write some of your stories the structure can become apparent.
I also think if we have a whole list of things to follow, like a check list, will keep many of us from writing our own stories. The stories are too important not to be written especially if you want to add more leaves to your family tree. Many people spend lots of time researching information about their family members and they got stuck in the structure and never add the stories that will give their family members a personality.
